by Charles Kirkland, Jr.
When her on-again, off-again boyfriend gets caught up in a three-million-dollar debt, the only way out is for Edie to do what she once did best: drive in the thriller, Eenie Meanie.
As a teenager, Edie Meaney was one of the best getaway drivers that there was. Now free from life, Edie is struggling to make ends meet when she is forced to come to the rescue of her ex-boyfriend, John. Because John has double-crossed Edie’s old boss and owes him three million dollars, Edie agrees to save his life by performing one last job, being the driver for a casino heist.
Eenie Meanie is a heist thriller film written and directed by Shawn Simmons. The film stars Samara Weaving, Karl Glusman, Steve Zahn, Randall Park, Jermaine Fowler, Andy Garcia, and Marshawn Lynch. Eenie Meanie is the feature film directorial debut for Simmons, who wrote and directed the YouTube thriller series Wayne.
From the very beginning of the movie, the unoriginality smacks the viewers in the face. The story is flat and predictable. After one scene in the second act, where Edie attempts to explain her motivations, comes the only portion of the movie that attempts to be coherent in its character development. Unfortunately, at that point in the film, the audience has unplugged from attempting to understand and is just waiting for the heist to begin.
The only engaging part of the movie comes at the start of the third act when the heist actually begins. The action scenes of the getaway feel more like the cheesy Gone in 60 Seconds chase scene than the creative and impressively executed stunt driving work of Baby Driver. Yet after plodding through the earlier portions of the movie, this mild adrenaline rush is a long-awaited and much-needed diversion in the movie.
While Samara Weaving seems to be tonally flat in her presentation of the role of Edie, the performances of Karl Glusman as the despicable ex, John, and Jermaine Fowler as the “Chaperone” seem to drive the emotions of the movie. Appropriately, the audience will hate John and struggle to understand Edie’s loyalty to him. Fowler’s character is the cool and sensible consciousness of the movie. He says what everyone thinks, which in turn validates the thoughts and emotions of the audience. Veteran actor Andy Garcia also works well as the reticent crime boss, but even he cannot save this one.
Rated R for violence/bloody images, pervasive language, nudity, some sexual material, and brief drug use, Eenie Meanie is a low-budget attempt at a heist movie. The action is average, but the inconsistent and often confusing story is subpar, extremely formulaic, and uninspiring. It’s not a stellar first for Shawn Simmons.
Eenie Meanie is available on Hulu starting August 22, 2025.
Grade: D+
